Every year at my office we get a flexible day off to celebrate our birthday. I like to think of it as a long weekend so I usually use it on the Friday of my birthday week and have a full “me day” of self care. which is basically a day by myself doing what I want to do. I have a slow morning sipping coffee and watching a morning talk show. I might get my nails done (which I rarely do). Hit up my favorite lunch spot. Go to a coffee shop and read on a cozy bench or couch. And I might go out to dinner or drinks with family and friends in the evening.
It actually puts a smile on my face just thinking about how delightful a day like that sounds. Maybe your day wouldn’t look just like that, but I bet you can imagine your day of self care. How you’d feel doing whatever your happy things are. And how refreshing a day like that feels to your mind, body, and soul.
Since becoming a mom and going back to work, my after work time has been largely dedicated to spending time with and taking care of Hayes, cooking and/or cleaning up dinner, getting some chores done around the house, and spending time with my husband (when our schedules align). Yes, I have nights with friends and social events, but most nights are at home with family and tasks. Each night goes by in a blink of an eye, seriously so fast. And that’s why I am extremely intentional with my morning routine. It allows me to find time for myself that is sacred and separate from the post-work dance.
But the reality for me is that even with that intentional self care in the morning there are weeks throughout the year that are crazy bananas and leave me feeling like a machine moving from thing to thing to complete tasks at the most efficient rate possible, rather than a human with emotional and physical needs. At the end of those busy busy times, I usually feel extremely drained, even if I am proud of making it through. I might binge a few episodes on Netflix one night to recover, but it’s mostly a forge ahead and eventually things start to even out again type of moment. I don’t think that’s the best way to deal with several stressful weeks in a row. It’s more like distracting myself than recharging.
The last time I had several weeks in a row that were busy busy I decided that the birthday vacation day concept should be put to use again this year. So I took a vacation day and spent it on myself.
I got up like I normally would for work and went through my normal morning routine, but after I dropped Hayes off at daycare, it was time for me time. I decided to start at one of my favorite coffee shops and work on my blog for a few hours over a warm mixed berry scone and a dark roast coffee. I went for a long walk listening to Free to Focus on Audible (I really am a personal development nerd). I picked out some new booties for the Fall and researched home office furniture while blasting the This is Lizzo playlist on Spotify. And I watched a couple episodes of Schitt’s Creek on Netflix.
At the beginning of the day it felt a little strange — almost like I was playing hooky from work — and I did have a small dose of mom guilt when I dropped Hayes off at daycare knowing that I wasn’t going to work after — but I remember taking a second while I was at the coffee shop, taking a deep breath and feeling so. much. gratitude for my life — the busy weeks and the deep calmness I felt in that moment. It was like my mind, body, and spirit took a huge deep breath. It was glorious. And it reminded me why taking time for myself is so important and it’s not something to feel guilt about.
I will without a doubt do this again. Maybe quarterly, maybe monthly, I haven’t decided yet if it will be planned or ad hoc. If you’re in the middle of a month of running, running, and more running try this out and carve out time for you and only you. Take a vacation day for yourself — or a half day or a couple of hours, whatever you can manage — and enjoy the heck out of it.
Have you ever done this? I’d love to hear what you did with your day off and how you practice self care!